Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
