Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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