did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
