Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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