Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
