nutella sex= disaster
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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