I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
