am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize