your thong is hanging out like whoa
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
