Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
