Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
