did you get engaged???
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize