your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
