how can u be prego again
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
