Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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