I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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