2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize
