Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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