North Korea, Best Korea!
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I have aggressive nipples.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
