Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
