My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
