just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
