so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
