So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize