And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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