Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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