You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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