the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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