Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
