i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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