So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
