I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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