Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
