We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
