i just made my gag reflex go away.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
