she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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