it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
