Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
