i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
