So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
wow bdsm is so cute
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
