I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Omg I joined a choir last night...
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
