He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
