Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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