I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Your penis caused this!
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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