i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
