You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
