I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
