i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
