i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
We had to coat check the pizza.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
