you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize